Another year is coming to an end. And I have to say that 2013 has been the most rich, random, new year of my life yet. And I’d have to say it was a year of trying things for the first time, saying YES to opportunities and crazy ideas. A year of experiencing feelings I’ve never experienced before, of allowing myself to live through those feelings and make decisions. It was a special year because I let go of my fears and insecurities and tried to push myself further in my professional life. Everyone knows how hard it is to leave that comfort zone of yours… But you just HAVE TO TRY. I tried myself in a leadership position and loved it. I am grateful for the people who believed in me and keep encouraging throughout the journey. Because of them I possibly know what I want to do in life. Or at least, I know that I don’t have to have it all figured out. It’s ok and, in fact, necessary to explore and try different things. I redeemed myself in a creative field and loved how my hand remembers the way the pencil puts strokes on the paper. I explored a digital world of drawing as well, making posters for my new job. Oh right, this year has been the first one I’ve been employed as a specialist and this experience is not comparable to anything as well.
If I was to separate that one thing I’ve taken out of 2013, it would all fit into one word: vulnerability. We cannot be afraid to be vulnerable, because in vulnerability lay all our strengths as a human being along with our weaknesses. And two do go together. The most common mistakes people make nowadays is trying to fight this notion of balance. You cannot block all negative feelings to feel all the positive. That’s not how it works. Humans are not machines, they need to see both sides of a coin and they need to feel as high as possible and as low as possible as well. And I thank Brene Brown and Sue Drinnan for helping me understand this. The key is to get rid of the fear. The fear of being hurt, the fear of making a mistake, the fear you are not good enough, the fear that you will not be happy with a change.. The truth is that you won’t know until you let go and try. Try, and break off that relationship that has been holding you down. Try, and stop finding excuses. Try, and agree with your inner voice that has been telling you that you are worth to be so much happier than you are now. Try, and put aside that feeling that you are not ready or experienced enough to take on a new role. Try, and realize that you are the one living your life and if you are not happy yourself , there is no way to make others around you happy. Try, and let yourself love again. We often forget that life is given us to live it, not to survive, not to climb the corporate ladder, not to please everyone, but to LIVE. How often we seem to forget that? Being vulnerable is not a weakness. It is a strength that is not available to many and it should be our oath to ourselves to try and discover the vulnerable me. Accept it. Embrace it. Live it.
Here’s to a new year!
Love it. HNY to you, Sasha!